“It’s the heart afraid of breaking
that never learns to dance.
It is the dream afraid of waking
that never takes the chance.
It is the one who won’t be taken
who cannot seem to give.
And the soul afraid of dying
that never learns to live.”
--Bette Midler
A friend and I were talking the other day about goals and things we wanted for this new year. I’m not much on New Years resolutions because I like to goal-set year round. However, I do choose one major thing at the start of a new year and endeavor to be better at that by years end.
My friend wondered if I’d set any concrete goals for my writing aims. While I do have plans for my writing, the biggest goal I’ve chosen is something that I’ve never been brave enough to do. For a long time, I didn’t know if it was something I should do. What is it?
This year, my goal is to live.
I don’t want to just sustain my life. I want to live. For me, that means taking the steps necessary to make sure that in December 2010, I didn’t tell myself, “It can wait.” It means making sure I took the time to cultivate and nurture the seeds of a dream. It means setting aside the doubts, fears, and voices that tell me I’m just too selfish. It means that I’ll finally listen to my husband when he tells me that he believes in me, supports me, and wants me to reach for my own personal star.
I don’t want fame. I don’t want fortune. All I want is the permission to know that I’m important enough to live—not just survive.
It’s difficult to even type this much. I like to give. I love to serve. I don’t want to be a selfish person. But I’m slowly starting to realize that God didn’t exclude me in the list of mankind that was meant to have joy. I’m allowed. And that’s something I’ve never really seen before.
This living isn’t just about writing. It’s about everything. I mean to make this next year of my life a life. I mean to step past the boundaries of my fear and emerge into the ideals of my heart. I mean to more fully reach for kindness and slough off the hesitation to act.
I will become my own friend and a better person. I’ll leave my old wounds behind but never my loved ones. I’ll laugh more, cry less. I’ll let love bloom and jealousy wither. I will step into the warm brilliance of happiness and I’ll stand there longer than I’ve ever let myself. Because I only have this one life.
And I intend to live it.
All my best,
L.T.
35 comments:
"It means that I’ll finally listen to my husband when he tells me that he believes in me, supports me, and wants me to reach for my own personal star."
WHOOHOO! IT'S ABOUT TIME, DANG IT!
By the way, I do believe in you, I do support you, I do want you to reach for your own personal star, and I do want you to hurry up and get something finished, dang it!
Now if you could just sign that multi million dollar so that I could code for this place I am at less, and for my own code more, that would be awesome. (How else am I supposed to take over the world?)=]
Wow. This is powerful, beautiful stuff Laura. I reserve the right to make you read this post if at any time in the future you begin to doubt that you are, in fact WORTH IT.
((Hugs)) my friend!
And three cheers to LIFE!! Huzzah!
Beautifully written. Go live it! I can't wait to see you fly. :)
Wow, I'll have some of that too! Beautifully written LT. I hope this is a wonderful year for you.
Good Goals!! Being a good friend is always a good thing to work on.
Me too. One of my mottoes this year is to Carpe Diem! i need to seize EVERY opportunity and write and get myself OUT of my comfort zone.
:) Any-hoo, I enjoyed reading your blog today! Have a great weekend!
Your goals are very upbeat and I believe when we receive joy we sprinkle joy all around us, so it is contagious.
You quote one of my top favorite song lyrics. Isn't that a great song?
One writing goal I share on my blog is that I have 3 magazine articles contracted for 2010 and I aim to have 6 articles published in 2010. That sounds do-able.
Happy New Year to All.
Sounds like we've been having the same thoughts, but you expressed it so much better than I could have. I want to live to. It's been a long time since I've really done it. Don't be afraid Laura and I won't be either.
All I can say is beautiful. Props to you for this goal; it's such a worthy one that I think everybody should work toward. :)
--Jenna.
I loved it Laura! Excellent post. You are going to conquer mountains this year. I can just feel it. Loves ya!
Don't lose this passion Laura. You are completely worth it.
I loved this post.
Yep, the soul of a poet. That's my pal, Laura.
My husband is the same way: "When are you going to get brave enough to send your stuff in for publication?"
Times 20+ years.
(He even has our future planned: He retires, we travel all over on my book tours, he golfs a lot. Somehow knowing he has pinned all his dreams of a life of leisure on my talents is kind of sexy...and deluded.)
You are an AMAZING writer! I hope you'll share your journey with us this year. Your determination is contagious.
"I will become my own friend and a better person." (That for me, is a biggie. And I loved reading it, as a small reminder to myself, too.)
Those are some divine goals. And you will live them all, that I'm sure.
Go for it, girly girl! I'm right behind you all the way!
Wonderful post, El. Care to share a little of that MoJo. Life is a wonderful thing. Can't wait to see what you do with it.
A. Men!
Go for it! Carpe diem.
Are you familiar with the Hindu concept of Kama? It means Desire. The Hindus believed that desire is rooted in human nature and that shutting out what we want entirely could therefore have detrimental effects. Live life in balance, self and others in equal share.
Good luck. :D
Why is it that we think our husbands' tastes are perfect in every thing... except us? I too have to remind myself to trust my husband when he tells me I'm _______ (good, funny, talented, pretty, not-fat, whatever). Thanks for writing and posting this. You are a poet. And I'm glad you're here.
You are SO Ethos. Go for it.
It's little wonder you and I feel that kindred spirit feeling so, so strongly. These same thoughts have been cycling through my own mind. To let go of the heavy weight of the clock hands and embrace the present more. Less bitterness over the past, less fear of the future, more actual, true and genuine LIFE. You're so right that we deserve to have joy too, and really, we don't have to be selfish to find it. Those who love us WANT us to live joyfully...it serves them as much as it serves us.
Love you!
Absolutely gorgeous, L.T. I pray you will fulfill your resolution and it will richly bless your life!
And what a wonderful friend you are. You are going to surprise yourself! LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!
What a wonderful writer you are! I stumbled across your blog today and I am resonating with your journey - including your resolution to live. As a pastor who started to make the transition into writer a few years ago, I know how much of my work has been about letting go of the internal barriers that keep me from really living and therefore writing.
For me there was a moment of clear revelation in which I felt a voice I took for God's own that said, "Be free, tell the truth, and don't do it alone."
Thanks for being a voice for that lifestyle that is life.
Gosh, LT, this made me cry. I try to hurdle my fears, but doubt drags me down. Your words touched me. I vow to redefine my goals and intentions. I vow to live instead of survive. I vow to write what I need to write without the all too familiar self-imposed boundaries that leave me feeling discouraged.
Thank you.
I'm proud of you Sis.
Let me know if you and the General ever need a couple extra friends to join in the party give me a call!
I'm Life's too short to sit back and watch it fly by. I'm proud of you.
~Houdini
I love this goal, to live. I think I'm just existing, and that is not acceptable to me, at all. I too shall endeavor to believe in myself as others do! You shall do wonders!!!!
You made me cry. Opening your heart means feeling everything in even greater degrees. Thanks for sharing your courage.
It's hard to imagine how someone like you doesn't believe you have permission to feel joy when you give so much to everyone else. You're always focused on other people. You're the one who knows how to make everyone else feel talented and worthwhile--you're a life-giver, Laura, as well as a wonderful writer. That's what it's all about. You, of all people deserve to feel talented and worthwhile. You are. We love you. Shut down the voices, wherever they're coming from, that tell you anything else, because they're lying.
Hello Laura!
I am so happy for you! I know what you mean about living life. I live more freely with the Lord by my side and that is what I intend to do no matter what. Life is too precious and much too short to to put off what Heavenly Father wants us to do.
Thank you for this beautiful post!!
((hugs))
:)
I don't now how I missed this post L.T.- forgive me!
I agree that God included you in the equation when He said, He came that you may have life and life more abundantly!
Beautiful!!
So fantastic! So wonderful! Good luck in all that comes to you this year. It really is amazing to me how much more everything is enriched when I go out of my comfort zone. Last year I did so many new things, so many big things and it's amazing to me how rich and blessed I felt. I know it's because I finally started going after things. Making the effort to get together with friends (I was always waiting for them to invite me, then I started doing the inviting and people wanted to play!) Learning things I've had on my list for years.
Good luck! It sounds like you're excited!!
Beautiful! Now go LIVE!
Here here.
I'm officially a basket case after reading this.
Go, and Live!
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